Fall Relationship Check-In
By: Liz Parker, LCMFT

Reconnect and Strategize To Finish the Year Strong

Each year, as Labor Day comes around, I find myself feeling like a new year is starting. Yes, according to the calendar, we change to a new year on December 31, but for me, September has always felt more like the beginning – an opportunity for change both in season and routine. Autumn is my favorite season and I eagerly anticipate the change of seasons as the summer ends and fall begins. For most of my formative years, it is when the school year began, I returned to familiar routines, and also had many new experiences. It gave me an opportunity to check-in, think about what I wanted to focus on in the upcoming year, and establish new goals to focus on for the fall season. In this spirit, I encourage you to use this “new year” to check in with your “calendar” year thus far.

I especially encourage you to check in with your relationship. Often, we can be more intentional about setting individual goals, but we do not take the time to set deliberate goals as a couple. By setting and working toward goals together, you can your partner can focus your energy on a common goal and celebrate your successes together! This can also help you to identify your strengths and strategies for effective teamwork, which you can apply to challenges that may arise.

Use this time of year as an opportunity to check in with your partner:

  • How have you attended to your relationship and your partner?
  • What successes can you celebrate?
  • Did you and your partner establish goals or implement changes? How are they going?
  • What goals do you want to focus on as a couple for the remainder of the year? How will these goals help you both remain connected?
  • What do you appreciate about your partner?
  • With the return of school and a tendency for things to get busier as summer ends, are there any barriers to remaining connected with your partner? How can you and your partner work together as a team to overcome these together?
  • What stressors are going on in your life that you can discuss with your partner and identify what support you need?

By taking the time to check in with each other and recognize the successes and challenges of the year thus far, you and your partner can make a roadmap to help you end the year. Happy Autumn!

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